Yep. I’m a bit stressed out at the moment. So this post may end up being a big whinge-fest or a completely illogical set of sentences. I don’t know.
I have to create and deliver a half hour presentation tomorrow to a large group of people. I have only just started to create it as I only really decided on what I was going to present on this afternoon. This is NOT GOOD. I need to be more prepared. I will have half an hour tomorrow to re arrange the room and sort out space for lunch to be served. All by myself as there are no other staff in the office tomorrow and the one volunteer is needed to keep the office open. So I’m stressed about that.
On Saturday I have my micro-teach for my teaching course. I have to teach a group of my peers (other teaching students) something for half an hour and be observed, marked and the other students will give me feedback. This will all go in my file. I have NO IDEA what to teach really. And I’ll have to do a lesson plan, which I also have to give to the observer! So I was thinking of teaching people how to make an origami iris. But then, that might be a bit complicated. Also, I’ve just found out that someone else is doing Origami (She is teaching how to make a Crane). So that makes me not want to do it. Because if I’m doing the same as someone else, I’m damned sure I want to be the best! And I don’t think I would be..
Then the rest of my assignments for my teaching qualification need to be handed in by 31st January. As do all the evaluations for one of the projects I’m working on. Normally these evaluations would not need to be in until mid April. However, as the Government (it its ultimate wisdom) is closing down the organization I’m funded by, they now require all evaluations to be done by the end of January. I haven’t finished all my work yet. So next week I will be on the phone ALL WEEK asking evaluation questions.
And I’ve been poorly. I couldn’t make it to work yesterday as I felt rubbish! I stayed horizontal for most of the day and spent last night sweating out whatever it was I had. I made it into work today.
So I’m stressed out. I have a major deadline every week until mid March now. I seem to have lost all of my self confidence and really don’t think I’m doing a good job nor that I can pass my teaching course. I’m frustrated that I can’t yet get the quality of photographs I want and I’m just really really tired. I have made lists, prioritized, got help where I can and I’m not sure what else I can do.
I just need to keep going for the next few weeks and I’ll be ok. That’s what I keep telling myself. But my body is saying otherwise! It’s telling me to sleep and be ill. But I can’t afford to do that at the moment.